Drowning in decisions

Here’s something that can make us miserable if we let it: too many decisions!

Social scientist Barry Schwartz says Americans are becoming less happy because we’re allowing ourselves to be overwhelmed by too many choices. His groundbreaking idea, originally published in his 2004 book The Paradox of Choice, has been echoed by recent studies.

Researchers from the University of Pennsylvania recently found that while having some choices is beneficial, excessive options often lead to decision paralysis and reduced satisfaction.

No sooner do we wake in the morning than we have to choose among hundreds of breakfast cereals, drinks and coffees. There are more than 40 kinds of toothpaste to choose from, hundreds of shampoos and, for the self-care-obsessed, hundreds of other ointments, salves and moisturizers.

Throughout the day, we’re pestered by telemarketers, pop-up ads and random texts that promise us we’ll be fit, smart and stylish if we buy the products they are pushing — and fat, dumb and dorky if we don’t.

Schwartz gives an example of a visit to a Gap clothing store to buy a pair of jeans. In the old days, the average fellow had only to choose between Wrangler or Levi’s, but not anymore. The Gap now offers slim fit, easy fit, relaxed fit, baggy, stonewashed, acid-washed, distressed, button fly, zipper fly, faded or regular.

Gone are the days of the cardboard-thick Sears Toughskins I was forced to wear as a boy.

But decisions over material things are just the beginning of our confusion. We’ve allowed ourselves to become as equally overwhelmed by the careers we choose, our jobs, our spouses… or even if we should marry at all.

From the Greatest Generation to now, the percentage of people of marrying age who got married dropped from 81 percent to just 44 percent, reflecting a dramatic decline in marriage rates over the decades.

And many young people who still hope to find a life partner aren’t just looking for a spouse or a companion, but a soulmate — that perfect person who is going to fill their hearts with joy every moment of every day.

The peculiar thing about the American mind — and I’m more guilty than anyone — is that we equate freedom with unlimited choice, when it is the opposite that is actually true. It is by limiting our choices that we are set free.

G.K. Chesterton said that marriage brings a man happiness because it gives him clarity and focus. By focusing his energies and affections on one woman, he is able to know the inner beauty and closeness of one woman.

Could you imagine being an artist, he said, who was trying to paint a canvas as large as the moon? Where do you start painting? No, it is the frame that liberates the artist. By being boxed into a small rectangular area, he is given a point of reference and perspective. It is the frame that sets the artist free.

Chesterton argues that true freedom comes not from limitless choices but from making a committed choice and sticking to it. Marriage, in his view, is an example of how committing to one person for life creates genuine freedom within boundaries.

That makes perfect sense to me.

I’m going to mull this important concept over as soon as I’m done choosing among 47 streaming services, 63 flavors of coffee and 27 types of hamburger patties — some of which have no meat!

See Tom Purcell’s syndicated column, humor books and funny videos featuring his dog, Thurber, at TomPurcell.com. Email him at Tom@TomPurcell.com.