A very COVID Christmas, or the 12 variants of Christmas

The weather turned cold for Christmas week across the country. It was so cold in Chicago, St. Louis and Atlanta that 150 murders had to be delayed.

When asked by one of that rare breed, a real journalist (one of the the few who actually did not serve up soft-ball questions) what Biden thought about the spike in inflation, White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki quickly reminded the reporter that consumers should not be bothered by inflation since there are no goods on the shelves to buy anyway.

Thus, most of us just try to buy our gifts on Amazon. But even there, consumers are complaining these days that the product they get is not what was represented online. It is just like Match.com.

First Lady Jill Biden hosted guests at the White House to see her Christmas lights, which took her days to hang. We were reminded of the lovely Hillary Clinton’s efficiency back when she was First Lady; the lights always mysteriously hung themselves, usually at the most opportune time.

It seems tragedy surrounds the Clintons; I actually feel sorry for them at times like these.  This year alone, the Clintons buried 15 family and political friends, five of whom were watching the Detroit Lions play after Thanksgiving dinner and were just napping.

What do you give President Biden, a man who has everything, for Christmas: low poll numbers, high inflation, and few legislative wins? West Virginia Senator and the guy running our country right now, Joe Manchin, is voting “no” on the wasteful “Build Back Better” boondoggle bill Biden wanted passed.

 When Democrats heard of the thoughtful negotiations in the Senate, where something is decided by the majority of  the Senators elected to represent the people of each state, they denounced Manchin’s demurral as “undermining democracy.” But isn’t that simply democracy? Some Dems even called Manchin a “cracker.”  Speaking for us crackers, the PC name we prefer now is “Saltine-Americans.” Thank you.

 The massive spending bill, which would have been just handouts to Democrat interests, costs at least $2 trillion. The administration could not believe this bill hasn’t passed; Hunter Biden didn’t even ask for a 10 percent cut “for the Big Guy” on this one.

 This Christmas seems a bit more worrisome than most. I blame Madison Avenue advertising for much of our angst. I was in New York City for a few days, where I saw The New York Times run ads for a $30,000 Cartier watch juxtaposed with an article about starvation in Venezuela. The difference between Hugo Boss and Hugo Chavez is always lost on the liberal New York Times.

Keeping politics out of family holidays is never easy, but if you do not take yourself or your political beliefs too seriously, it becomes easier. I manage well in this arena by never bringing up politics in a social setting unless the other person does it first. We live in a 49% to 51% world, so you have an even chance of making someone angry by asserting your political views. And you might lose a friend. But on the bright side, that is one fewer gift you have to buy.

Contrary to what you may think, I personally do not mind a multicultural holiday season. The best time I have is celebrating over Passover with my Jewish friends. Jews eat Chinese food, drive German cars and live in Mediterranean houses. They tell me that they like me being a part of their holiday because Hanukkah cannot be celebrated without a lot of crackers at the table.

I did have a nice experience last Christmas. I went to a local restaurant, Pescado, and saw a family at a table together with their heads bowed in prayer. It turned out all seven were on their cell phones, but it felt good anyway.

We will spend over one trillion dollars on Christmas gifts this year. We are too focused on the material and not on the spirit of the season. Thank goodness we have Joe “Plugs” Biden around to keep us focused on the real meaning of Christmas: the birth of Santa Claus.

On the bright side of 2021, the self-proclaimed “I am science” Dr. Fauci magnanimously decreed that we can gather with others for Christmas. But he told us to wear masks and went on to predict that masks will be required on airplanes indefinitely.  America is tired of it. But just because people are sick and tired of something does not mean that it can’t go on indefinitely. Marriage, for example.